A strip club
by sti
Summary: Sequel to Ten inches. Sirius is bored again and he drags Remus to meddle with other's people business. They are not happy at all. M FOR A REASON!


**A strip club**

**This is a sequel to Ten inches, you don´t need to read it first but you will understand more if you do. **

**I didn´t forget about HN, the next chapter should be soon up. **

**Disclaimer: I don´t own HP**

**Thank you, ginnyjaffa, for wonderful betareading.**

"Good afternoon, Lily-Flower, you look especially beautiful today, I must say!" Sirius Black yelled jovially while stepping out from the fireplace and dusting himself off.

Lily didn't even look at him, she was too busy checking herself in a large mirror. She just sighed dejectedly. "Sirius. If you are here for dinner, the chicken is in the oven, but you will have to heat it up for yourself."

Sirius pouted. "Aw, you always assume that I just use you for food."

Lily lifted one eyebrow and looked at him in mirror. "Don't you?"

"Well, yes, I love your cooking skills but that doesn't mean that I don't come here just to say hello." He smirked at her charmingly.

"Sure." Lily nodded shortly and continued to apply her mascara.

"Uh, you are really friendly today." Sirius stated sarcastically.

Lily sighed and turned towards him with her hand on hips. "Sirius, you know that I love you dearly but I _really _have to hurry, I'm almost late!"

When she turned, he finally noticed her appearance. And he whistled. "Oh my, Lily, you are hot!" She was wearing high black boots and black leather coat. Her skirt had to be too short because he couldn't see it under her coat which ended mid thigh. She usually didn't use much make-up but she made an exception today. She accented her sparkling green eyes by grey eye shadow, her dark red lips ready to bite somebody.

Lily started laughing. "Why thank you, you don't compliment to me often, so I have to treasure it."

"You are welcome." He shook his head, still in shock of her appearance. "Where is Prongs anyway?"

"Oh, he had some business meeting to attend." Lily waved her hand.

"Business? Isn't he an Auror? I would have sworn we worked together just today." Sirius joked.

Lily checked her appearance one last time, grabbed her wand and stuffed it in her purse. "Yeah, but you know, Potters own a lot of stock, McDonald wanted to buy something."

"Ah. I understand." Sirius agreed. "But. Wait! Where are _you _going? Looking like this?" He looked at her accusingly.

Lily, with her hand on the doorknob turned to him impatiently. "To a friend's club. She opened it last month, so I want to try it. Is that the end of your interrogation or do you have some more questions?"

"Okay. You're in hurry, I see. That's all." Sirius looked at her, disappointed. He was looking forward to spending his free evening with his friends and they both ditched him. He eyed Lily a bit suspiciously. James wasn't at home and she was going _alone _to the _club_ wearing almost _nothing._ Weren't married people supposed to stay at home, waiting for their beloved to return from work? He would have to try to talk to James – something was definitely off.

"Well, I'm off." Lily opened the door. "Bye! Wash dishes after you eat! And don't forget to lock up!"

"Don't worry mum!" Sirius shouted after her.

She didn't answer, she just chuckled and apparated away.

Sirius clasped his hand together. _What now? If James was out with old McDonald, he wouldn't be in the mood for fun. Lily is out clubbing...It leaves Moony!_ He forgot all about food, grabbed handful of Floo powder and disappeared into flames.

**Ooo**

Remus Lupin had a very nice evening. He was sitting in quite comfortable armchair in front of the fireplace, reading his favourite book, _The Lord of the Rings_, and sipping a cup of hot chocolate. He sighed happily, he hadn't done something like this in months so he very much appreciated this spare moment without work, his werewolf issues and without Sirius. Merlin forbid, he loved his friend but sometimes it was just too much. However, his peace and quiet didn't last long.

"Moony, my friend!" Sirius appeared in front of him.

Remus was caught in shock and he spilled his yummy chocolate all over his pants. "Merlin Padfoot! Look what you did!" He cried exasperatedly.

"Uh, sorry mate, I didn't mean to scare you." Sirius apologized surprisingly sincerely. "However, you don't look very pleased that I had decided to honour you with my presence." He added in mock hurt.

Remus shook his head resignedly and withdraw his wand.

"M-m-moony, what are you doing?" Sirius asked uncertainly, backing off with his hands raised in surrender gesture. "I didn't do it on a purpose, I swear." He started to panic because he left his wand at home and Remus was well known for some very creative hexes.

Remus just rolled his eyes. "I am not going to jinx you, dolt. I am just trying to clean up your mess." He cast _Scourgify_ on his pants and the hot patch disappeared.

"Oh, okay." Sirius visibly relaxed.

"What are you doing here anyway? It's six o´clock, don't you usually have dinner at Prongs and Lily's place at this time?" Remus asked curiously and somewhat resigned, knowing that he wouldn't be returning to his book today.

"Hmm, I intended to." Sirius plopped in the other armchair and made himself comfortable. "They're both out."

"So you just decided to bother me?" Remus asked jokingly.

"Ah, Moony, you wound me!" Sirius put his hands over his heart and frowned dramatically. "I'm here to take you out, have fun, live a little and you are accusing me of such horrible things."

Remus laughed. "What I am going to do with you? Well, it doesn't look like I have any other choice so what did you have in your mind?"

Sirius's eyes sparkled mischievously. "I have an idea. Put something presentable on and we're off!"

Remus narrowed his eyes in suspicion. "What are we going to do, Padfoot?"

Sirius laughed. "It's a surprise Moony. Hurry up! You will like it, I promise."

Remus looked at him skeptically but he got up and headed to his room to change.

**Ooo**

They apparated into a dark alley in the centre of the London.

Remus looked at Sirius expectantly. "What now?"

Sirius smirked. "Around the corner is an exclusive club, we are going to have some fun!" He grabbed Remus by his upper arm and dragged him behind him. "Ah and we're here!" He announced victoriously.

Remus looked up and gasped. "A strip club? Padfoot! I won't go in-in such a-a di-dirty hole!"

"Aw Moony, no need to stutter, it's perfectly normal, you don't have to blush." Sirius teased lightly but his hold on Remus's hand got stronger, just in case Remus decided to run away.

"No, no, no! I refuse to go with you to this devil's nest." Remus started to panic. He was a nice and shy guy who avoided girls like plague. The only girl who he ever let close was Lily and it was only because she was "safe" – she was with James.

"Moony, don't start with this shit on me. You are going and that's my last word." Sirius stated resolutely.

"Padfoot, don't do this to me, please." Remus actually started to beg.

"Moony, look." Sirius pointed his free hand towards the front door. "This club is on a high level for exclusive customers only, not some dirty hole you have nothing to be afraid of."

"Of course, you are so reliable so I have to trust you, don't I?" Remus retorted sarcastically.

"Why can't you believe me? It was Lily who mentioned this club first. She told me about it a month ago, her muggle friend is running it here." Sirius tried to persuade him.

"You won't let me go, will you?" Remus's accepted his defeat reluctantly. The mention about Lily calmed him a bit down, she wouldn't befriend the wrong people, she was always so careful.

"Nope." Sirius grinned victoriously as he put his hand on the doorknob and opened the door quickly.

Remus followed him hesitantly inside, still full of doubts but also knowing that there was no way back.

"Okay, here we are." Sirius sighed happily as he raised his hands to show everything to Remus. "I have been here once and it was awesome. I promise you, you won't regret this night."

"Yeah, I won't, I am already regretting." Remus muttered under his breath, not loud enough for Sirius to hear him.

"Do you see this big podium in the middle? These girls dancing there are quite good but nothing special. You can get there some lap dance too." Sirius explained excitedly.

Remus just nodded, lost of his words. He avoided women because of his monthly problem so he didn't get close to anyone so let's just say that he saw more bare skin here in five minutes than in his whole life before.

"And there." Sirius pointed his hand at the other end of the room.

Remus narrowed his eyes when he tried to look at it, it was quite difficult because the room was dark with occasional flash of lights coming from the main stage.

"There are private stages, separated by curtains, you can watch your selected girl alone, without other people around. Isn't it cool?" Sirius was in heaven.

"Hmm." Remus nodded absentmindedly, his eyes scanning the room, desperately searching for some alcohol.

"They have hotter and, uh how to say it... I know, more flexible girls there." Sirius winked at Remus conspirator.

Remus shuddered, he was a bit disturbed by Sirius' mimics.

"Oh, and the rumour is" Sirius leaned towards Remus and whispered in his ear secretively "that if you offer enough and you look decent, they can take you upstairs and show you the Eden."

Remus stepped out of Sirius's reach and looked at him worriedly. "You are not planning on doing it tonight, are you?"

"Ah Moony, don't be afraid, I won't leave you alone." Sirius barked a laugh and he threw his hand over Remus's shoulder leading him towards boxes.

**Ooo**

While they were waiting for their drinks and girl they have chosen to arrive, Remus turned to Sirius one last time. "Are you –"

"Moony," Sirius interrupted him immediately. "Lily's best muggle friend, Janice, runs this club. It's clean. The girls are very well paid, they are here voluntarily, nobody made them to do it. They take you upstairs only when they like you. Everything is legal, everybody is healthy – whoa, wait a moment!"

"What?" Remus jumped up frightened. "What happened? Something is not right? Can I catch STD here?"

"No, no, this club is ok but I just realized that - that ." Sirius shook his head dazedly, he couldn't bring himself to say it.

"Padfoot." Remus snapped his finger in front of his face. "You okay?"

Sirius turned to him, horrified expression etched on his face. "Lily's friend runs this place and Lily went to her friend's club today. She's here!"

"Oh Padfoot and I was afraid that something terrible happened." Remus chuckled in relief. "What would she do in here? I haven't seen here any male strippers and she doesn't swing the other way."

"No, you don't understand." Sirius cried desperately. "When I saw her before, she was dressed like a hooker. Very exclusive but still hooker. I couldn't say it to her face but she was."

"You mean, like she is working here?" Remus scoffed. "Preposterous. Why? She doesn't need money and she loves Prongs so she can't do it for fun either."

"No, she was acting suspiciously today, she was a bit on the edge like she didn't want to see me." Sirius couldn't be convinced. "We should look around here and make sure if she doesn't dance here."

"Padfoot, stop it." Remus tried to hold him down but he tripped over his cloak and fell down while Sirius managed to look in the box on their right side.

"Nobody is here." He stated disappointed.

"I told you-" Remus was interrupted when the lights in their box went off and their girl appeared at the stage.

_She is dressed like Lily_. Sirius started to panic. _What if she is Lily? What should I do?_ Fortunately, the girl turned her face to him and he could sigh with relief. She wasn't Lily. _Well, I could as well relax, I can find Lily later, oh that ass is quite spectacular. _Lily was forgotten.

**Ooo**

Sirius smiled dazedly and crossed hands behind his head. This girl was amazing. The way she was moving...oh he was moments from grabbing her and asking her to take him upstairs, leaving Remus behind. However, that was the moment when he heard it. It was low sultry whisper. "You like that? Hmm, I can feel how much you enjoy it."

Even though he never heard her voice in that tone, he immediately recognized it. _Lily!_ He sat straight in his armchair, looking from the left to the right like a dear in the headlights. _Where did it come from? _He heard a male growl. _From the left. _He jumped from his seat, not that anybody noticed, Remus was too absorbed in the performance in front of him.

He inconspicuously pushed the curtain to the side and looked into the neighbouring box. And he froze like a statue. There was a woman, beautiful, flexible, curvaceous, perhaps ten times better dancer than their girl, giving a lap dance to same bloke. He was wearing a black suit and hat, just like these Mafioso boys in TV. His hands were covered in gold rings, on his left hand stood up a very expensive Rolex which Sirius always wanted. This all seemed quite normal for a scene in strip club except for one tiny detail. That woman was Lily.

_Holy Merlin. What I am going to do? What is she going to do?_ Sirius thought frantically. _I have to stop it! Prongs is going to be so devastated! That bitch!_

"Mmm." Lily moaned loudly after one particularly hard grind of their hips. "I think it's time to move this upstairs." She whispered in the man's ear seductively.

They started to get up and Sirius panicked. He made a split decision – he turned around, grabbed Remus, grabbed stripper, showed her handful of money and smiled at her sweetly. "Would you like to take us upstairs?" He bored his smouldering grey eyes into hers, something what charmed all girls at Hogwarts. That always worked and it didn't disappoint this time, too.

She giggled and then nodded enthusiastically. "This way, gentlemen." She led them, swaying her hip a bit too much.

Remus grabbed Sirius's upper arm and hissed into his ear angrily. "What the hell are you doing?"

"Lily is here." Sirius whispered. "I saw her going upstairs with some dude and we have to stop them!"

"I thought that we had made it clear, there is no chance in hell for her being here!" Remus stomped on his foot annoyed.

"I saw her. With those two eyes." Sirius gestured harshly. "Just come and see." He pulled Remus behind him.

"Well." The girl turned towards them once they reached first floor. "Just come with me through this door and every your wish and dream is fulfilled." She eyed Sirius lustfully, it wasn't often such a handsome bloke came there, men like him didn't have any problems finding a girl.

But Sirius had registered movement with a corner of his eye . Somebody just closed the other door. _There she is._ He turned his attention to their stripper. "What is your name, baby?" He purred sweetly.

"Linda." She winked at him.

"Linda. That's beautiful name, just like you. Can I ask you for something?" He smirked.

"Anything." She breathed.

"Well, you see, my friend and I, we had a very stressful day today and we have just returned from a business trip." He stroked her arm lightly. "We were wondering if we could refresh a bit, a shower maybe?" He leaned towards her, breathing on her neck.

Even though that she should have been used to all this, she couldn't resist Sirius's charm, she was blushing like every other woman who Sirius decided to bewitch. "That door. Don't take long, I will wait for you." She battled her eyelashes and disappeared into her room.

"Good." Sirius took a deep breath. "Are you ready Moony?"

"No." He grumbled. "But what can I do?"

They crept slowly towards door that Sirius assumed was Lily's. It was locked. Sirius cautiously looked down the corridor, he withdraw Remus' wand, which he nicked a while ago, and with a quick _Alohomora_ opened the door. They showed their heads into the room carefully. What they saw, was far worse than Sirius´s imagined.

_Merlin._ Remus's eyes almost fell out of their socket.

_That whore, I am going to kill her with my bare hands! And Prongs trusts her!_ Sirius clenched his fists so hardly that his knuckles went white.

They were looking at it from the side so they could see Lily very well but she didn't see them. The room was dark, only illuminated by four little red lights.

Lily's customer was lying on the bed in his silk blue boxers, his clothes all over the floor. Lily stood above him, slowly pulling pins from her hair to let it loose. Finally, she shook her head and her dark red hair fell down slowly, caressing her shoulders like a silk.

"Don't forget our agreement." She whispered huskily. "I can do whatever I want, you are not allowed to touch me. Understood?" She asked dominantly. The man only groaned in response. "Good." She nodded her head. She raised her outstretched leg and she began to roll down her stocking slowly, almost painfully slowly. "You like that?" She asked as she stroked her leg in her whole length, then she raised it and rubbed it against the bulge in his boxers. He groaned again and made a move to catch her with his hands. "No, no. What did I say? No hands. I think I have to punish you." Lily lowered down to him, reached somewhere behind her and raised handcuffs to his face. "You have been a bad boy, you are going to be tied to the bed." And with a click, she chained him up. She stood up again and continued her show with her other stocking. Once she was done, she took both of her stockings and sat down on his legs. "Just to be sure." She smiled deviously and used her stockings to tie his legs to the bed, too. Then she turned to him she looked at him provocatively. She bent down to his navel and started to plant open mouthed kisses there. She slowly made her way up, to his ear. She breathed in his ear. "Wanna see my tits?" Her only response was a grunt and his attempt to grind into her. "Mmm, I think you do." She sat up straight and lowered one shoulder. One strap fell down. The man's breathing quickened. She did the same with the other strap. She raised her hands and started kneading her breasts through her lacy bra, pushing it aside and revealing rosy nipples. He groaned again. She quickly unhooked it and threw aside. Then she pushed herself lower on his legs, her face once again on his navel, her hands on his waistband, slowly undressing him –

That was the moment Sirius recovered from his shock. He pushed the door fully open and ran into the room. Lily screamed in fright. He jumped on the bed, knocking her to the floor. She quickly grabbed a T-shirt which she found on the floor and covered herself. Remus cautiously followed Sirius, stopping in the middle of the room, looking at Lily in disgust. In the meantime, Sirius sat on customers' abdomen and began to throttle him. This woke Lily up.

"Sirius, don't!" She started to yell.

"Shut up you bitch!" He spat at her venomously.

The man began to emit choking noises but he still managed to free his legs from stockings and now was working on his hands. Sirius didn't notice anything, his vision was blurred by his rage.

"No, please stop!" Lily picked herself from the floor and tried to knock him down.

He turned to her and pushed her back forcefully. "You whore, how could you, how could you do this to my best friend!"

These few seconds of not being choked was enough for the men to open his handcuffs. He threw Sirius down and they both rolled down on the floor fighting all the time. They were boxing, kicking, groaning when one of them hit a good spot, it was a fight which one of them couldn't survive. Or so Sirius thought.

"Stop! Stop!" Lily was in hysterics now.

"Don't tell me what should I do, you slut." Sirius's vocabulary was obviously very colourful, he managed to insult Lily every time with another swear.

The man's fist appeared out of nowhere and he sent Sirius flying to the ground. He sat on him and held his hands above hand so he couldn't escape.

In the same moment Remus decided that it could be a good idea to turn on lights.

"What the _fuck_ are you two doing here!" The man for emphasis his words slammed Sirius to the ground forcefully.

"P-p-prongs?" Remus stuttered.

"What?" When Sirius heard Remus, he opened his eyes to a very pissed face of his best friend.

"I said, what are you two _fuckers _doing here?" James didn't usually swear, Lily didn't like it, but this time he was going to swear and hit how much he wanted.

"I- we – saw" Sirius couldn't find the right words. "I mean, what are _you _doing here."

James just growled. "I was quite enjoying evening with _my wife_ until you two _imbeciles_ decided to burst here."

Remus looked from frightened Lily to his two best friends, one of them lying on the floor while the second, almost naked, sitting on him and holding his hands. "Oh." He understood. Then he blushed. And then he was angry. "You." He pointed his accusing finger on Sirius. "You idiot!"

Sirius only managed to squeak faintly, "What? Me?"

However, Remus reached his breaking point, there was no force in the world which could stop him. "Why do _you_ have to always drag me to the most embarrassing situations? You ass! Why do you always have to meddle with other people businesses? You're only creating mess. Only _you _have to spy on your best friend with his girlfriend "measuring", only _you _have to drag me to the strip club, make me watch my best friend wife going down on him and then see my two best friends wrestle almost naked on the floor." He didn't seem to breathe during his rant. "You are ruining my life! I won't be able to sleep because I will be haunted by all these disgusting images."

An offended "Hey" sounded from Lily.

Remus didn't let anything interrupt him. "Do you know how long it took for me to forget about all this _ten inches_ so I can eat peacefully without the urge to throw up? I now had it all live! Not only _hearing_ about it but actually _seeing it_! Excellent! Really good job." He was waving his hand around him like a madman.

"Moony." Sirius tried to talk to him.

Remus didn't have any of this. "No, I am done with you. I am _never_ going _anywhere_ with you, you prick." He turned to other two people in room. "Prongs, Lily, I am deeply sorry. I hope you can forgive me for participating in this idiotic show." He nodded his head at them. "I think you understand that I am going to be unavailable for a few weeks. I'm sorry." And with these words, he disapparated.

James turned his attention down to Sirius. He got off him, grabbed him by collar and stood him up. "I don't know what were you doing Padfoot, what were you thinking or rather _weren't_ thinking but I'm sure that I don't want to know. And if you treasure your testicles, you won't appear near us soon." He finished threateningly.

Sirius started backing up to the door slowly. "I – but – still – how?" He was a bit confused.

"What?" Lily snapped at him hatefully.

"I mean, what were you doing here?" He finally found words.

She smirked at him maliciously. "You with your bragging about your sexual experience should figure it out." She advanced slowly as he was retreating. "Ever heard of role playing?" She slammed door to his face.

**Thank you for reading, please review!**


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